“The package…falls far short of what is needed. It is too narrow, too small and will be delivered too slowly. Above all, (it) betrays an undervaluation of the importance of education for individuals and as a driver of a more prosperous and healthy society” (Kevan Collins)
Bedazzled
Morning mist once again burned off Monday and sunny weather persisted much of the week. Dozing from early dawn, I rose feeling unrested. I let Phil lie in while I fetched the tea. He awoke groggily from a heavy slumber. Lucky him! Unlike the last bank holiday, we were keen to get out and enjoy this one. Debating where to go, Phil searched a baffling array of magic stones, all some distance away. Seeing a much closer outcrop labelled on the map, I suggested a shorter walk and assembled a small picnic.
We headed out in dazzling sun to the opposite side of the valley where fallen fluffy catkins resembled dust on the pavement and bluebells gave the illusion of violet fields. At the western edge of the wood, a man inexplicably built a blazing fire. Further up, dandelions displayed luminous flowers and perfectly round seed heads. We ascended the lane through a gate into fields where spooky dead trees redolent of the holy land inspired my next haigai. Umpteen stiles later, we emerged onto another lane, dodging nasty flies lurking in a muddy quagmire and a group of walkers with a tiny dog coming the other way. Turning right, we stopped by a tinkling brook to eat, surrounded by hewn rocks, tussocks, delicate cuckoo flowers, buzzing bees and small heath butterflies. We then followed the treeline along the top of woodland. Phil thought he spotted the named outcrop, but with others nearby, it was hard to be sure. On the final steep descent, we gave our aching knees a break at a field where supine sheep grazed on overgrown grass. A mother and lamb lay comically at right angles. “Push-me-pull-ewe!” A refreshing breeze up top dropped significantly lower down, making us hot. Luckily reaching home before heatstroke set in, I started editing photos but had to stop with fatigue. (For a Fuller description of the walk, see ‘Cool Places’ii)
Blackburn overtook Bolton as the epicentre of Indian variant cases. Concerned Ravi Gupta of Nervtag called for further easing of restrictions to be postponed and sage bod Susan Michie warned: “We’re on a knife-edge. Either it could run away as it did at Christmas or potentially it could be contained. Everybody’s behaviour could potentially make the difference.”
Useless George trolled out the familiar government line about not making a decision until 14th June. Ministers wanted all over 50’s to get 2 vaccine doses by 21st June (didn’t they know it took a month to be effective?) As infections rose in Hounslow, Twickenham rugby stadium offered jabs to anyone over 18. People were left fuming after queuing for hours in the heat when the drugs ran out. The OECD predicted UK GDP would grow but less than other G7 countries and said worldwide recovery could be uneven due to disparities in vaccine distribution. Rishi Rich called the forecast “testament to the ongoing success of our vaccine rollout and evidence our plan is working.” If you say so! UK travellers had to demonstrate ‘compelling reasons’ for going to France and quarantine for 7 days. From the Have I Got News For You repeat, I learnt of a cloak and dagger operation to smuggle posh food deliveries into Downing Street, paid for by a tory donor’s wife, and that The Bumbler and Nasty Patel wore jackets with their job titles sewn on – in case they forgot, obvs!
Bespattered
In spite of a bath the previous night, my muscles ached Tuesday, including my buttocks. Had I strained my gluteus maximus? Cleaning the kitchen, I got distracted by the state of the toaster after recent heavy usage. I expunged a mountain of crumbs and bespattered the sink. I spent the rest of the morning writing, then went to get cash and a top-up shop. It was all going on, on the street below; the shed people worked outside while tanning, naked kids paddled in a small pool and neighbours chatted inanely. I arrived at the co-op to discover I’d forgotten my purse so slogged back and forth in the heat. The ATM bafflingly let me go through the whole process before failing to dispense any money. I omitted a couple of groceries to stay within budget, dodged half-term kids running amok and asked at the kiosk about the cash machine to be told in characteristically brusque fashion: “It’s nowt to do with us!” Back home, I filled 2 bags with garden waste, and slumped on the sofa hot and exhausted to gulp water before having a lie down. Early evening, a bee buzzed the wrong side of the living room window. I tried to usher it out but it became stressed so I left it. In the process, I noticed a pocket watch Phil had been fixing on the floor. He crawled around searching for the tiny hands only finding one, and seemed to think it was my fault. “Don’t blame me. I’m always telling you not to put things on the floor!”
The WHO renamed variants in line with Greek letters: Alpha, Kent; Beta, South Africa; Gamma, Brazil; Delta, India. For the first time since 30th July 2020, no UK covid deaths were officially reported but cases in Yorkshire rose 19% within a week, although numbers in hospital fell. Covboost trials started in Leeds and Bradford, using 1 of 7 vaccines (AZ, Pfizer, Moderna, Novavax, Valneva, Janssen and Curevac). Prof. Dingbat concurred with the official message that there was ‘nothing in the data’ to warrant abandoning the roadmap. “From a societal point of view, I think it’s really important that we go ahead on June 21st…we’ve got to look at the collateral damage…(and) the impact of economic damage that would be caused by further periods of delay and uncertainty.” Prof. Finn disagreed. With people still vulnerable, the job wasn’t yet done and going ahead with easement ‘may be a bad decision’. Boris chimed in: “We need to work out…to what extent the vaccination programme has protected enough of us, particularly the elderly and vulnerable against a new surge. And there, I’m afraid, the data is just still ambiguous.”
Heathrow re-opened terminal 3 to separate red list arrivals at long last. As the eviction ban ended, the Joseph Rowntree Foundation said 800,000 tenants were at risk of homelessness and half had already received notice. Discussing a new pollution charge for brum-brums in Brummie, some befuddled idiot on BBC Breakfast advocated placing monitors away from the road – well, that would make levels drop! It was later announced there’d be a 2-week delay imposing fines while people got used to the idea.
Buttocks still hurting Wednesday morning, I forced myself to do exercise. I noticed bits bespattering the bedroom rugs, gave them a quick wash and hung them on the line. Carefully hoovering the living room, I saw no sign of the missing watch hand. I worked on the journal and enticed Phil with the promise of ice cream in the sun after lunch. Waiting for him outside, I caught up with the elderly neighbour sat reading in the shade. She seemed much better and less befuddled than last time we spoke. We went into town where Phil popped in the convenience store while I collected a Boots order. A couple of damaged items bespattered other purchases and a faff ensued processing the refund. Finally able to get cash, we swerved through the busy square for ice cream cones from the sweet shop. No free space, we crossed to the memorial gardens and found a bench to scoff the rapidly-melting treats before continuing into the park, resplendent with leafy trees, rhododendrons and large red poppies.
4,330 new cases and 12 deaths were recorded but 75% of adults now had 1 dose of vaccine and 50% had 2. The Salesman announced help for school kids to catch up. Additional tuition and an extra year in sixth form amounted to 1/10th of the budget originally slated. He promised more to come but not when. A baffled Tsar Kevan Collins (who I’d never heard of but worked on the plans) resigned, saying the package fell short, was too narrow and betrayed “an undervaluation of the importance of education.” ‘Yeah,’ I thought, ‘that’s cos they’re all toffs who went to posh schools’. Some tories did criticise the pathetic sum including Rob Halfon who said the money could’ve been found behind the sofa and wanted books not tanks. Speaking of which, NATO sec-gen Jens Stollenberg called for the immediate release of Roman Protasevich, an ‘impartial international investigation’ and the sanctions agreed against Belarus to be fully implemented. A 4-day bank holiday weekend was proclaimed in honour of the queen’s platinum jubilee a year hence.
Bedevilled
Duller on Thursday, we spent a dull day at home cleaning and working on laptops. Wanting to store winter jumpers, one really stank and needed a good wash first. I thought it wise to have a siesta after skipping it the day before. However, it was of little use and later, I could barely keep my eyes open or my head up. Developing a sore throat and the scary sensation of being unable to swallow, I took aspirin at bedtime but woke hot and sweaty several times during the night.
As Indian deaths reached 335,102, incidents of the Delta variant rose to 7,000. Bolton and Blackburn were still bedevilled with 3,000 cases. The so-called UK leaders’ Covid summit was in fact a pointless zoom meeting. Sturgeon and Drakeford said there needed to be ‘hard outcomes’. Meanwhile, G7 health ministers met in Oxford to discuss addressing the global vaccine issue and draw up a Pandemic Preparedness Roadmap. The ‘100 day mission’ would be presented to G7 leaders next week. Sarah Gilbert, inventor of AZ, called for them to share vaccines more widely and UNICEF wanted them to donate 20% of doses June-August, saying it could be done without disrupting existing programmes. In changes to the travel traffic lights, no countries were added to the green list, Afghanistan, Bahrain, Costa Rica, Egypt, Sri Lanka, Sudan, Trinidad & Tobago turned red and Portugal went from green to amber. The Cock said it was because of a new Nepal mutant of the Delta variant but the WHO bafflingly claimed there was no such thing. Effective from 8th June, sun-seekers felt betrayed and scrambled for flights back before having to quarantine and take extras tests. Labour cried ‘chaos’, the Portuguese government ‘failed to see the logic’, Antonio Costa railed: “we can’t have a system of instability and change every 3 weeks” and EasyJet chief Johan Lundgren called it “a huge blow…with Portuguese rates similar to those in the UK it simply isn’t justified by the science.”
3-D Pen3 developed by Prof. Noam Sobel of Israel’s Weizmann Institute, identified coronavirus in the nose with 94% accuracy by sniffing out volatile organic compounds. Tim Brexit Martin incredulously proposed new visas for EU workers to fill Wetherspoons vacancies. He denied he had staff shortages or changed his stance on Brexit: “A reasonably liberal immigration system controlled by those we have elected, as distinct from the EU system, would be a plus for the economy and the country.” Phil guffawed and I wondered: “would that be attracting the brightest and best bar staff, Tim? How about paying more than minimum wage?” With 50 days to go, a practice medals Olympic ceremony was held. Tokyo 2020 president Seiko Hashimoto was ‘100% convinced’ the games would go ahead but 80% of Japanese polled wanted them cancelled, 10,000 volunteers quit and 100 areas pulled out of hosting duties.
A QT questioner asked were the government waiting for Marcus Rashford to step in over the paltry £50 per pupil budget for extra tuition? Airhead tory Lucy Frazer blathered about giving laptops to schools and Labour’s Peter Kyle laughingly claimed kids were breaking into schools. He didn’t like the idea of Freedom Day, as 21st June was dubbed, or the amber list. Veteran broadcaster Jenni Murray was scared and confused.
Friday, I was yet again bedevilled by fatigue and sinusitis. Phil also felt unwell but managed to get brekkie . I bathed, stuck a sarong on, fetched coffee and the laptop, and went moodily back to bed to draft and post blogs. Meanwhile, Phil worked downstairs and shopped for weekend supplies, finding a few things missing from the co-op shelves, notably leafy veg (no doubt due to a rash of barbecues). I got a few minutes outdoors to help him hang sheets on the line – a precarious task as we both wobbled, but nice to catch a blast of sun and a glimpse of Welsh Poppies in the garden. Returning to writing, the laptop’s fan went into overdrive so I called a halt before it burst into flames.
Phil interrupted evening film viewing asking for a pen to write down a bafflingly long password. “What is that for?” “ Block chains.” “The devil’s work!” He later assured me he’d only created an account and hadn’t stumped up any actual cash yet (or bitcoins for that matter).
The R rate up to 1-1.12, 11 deaths were recorded and ONS data showed covid cases rose 76.5% 22nd-29th May (the highest since 16th April). Most were in the North West, followed by the East Midlands and South West with slight rises in the West Midlands and London. Up more among over 35’s and 11-16 year olds, James Naismith of Oxford University put it down to 2 factors: the easing of lockdown measures and the Delta variant. Prof. Ferguson warned the figures pointed in a negative direction and the government should be cautious. The Pfizer vaccine was approved for 12-15 year olds and the government asked JCVI to advise on routine vaccination of teens. Trussed-up Liz’s latest trade deals with Iceland, Norway and Liechtenstein, encompassed her beloved cheese, pork, poultry and fish, nurses, lawyers and vets. Did digital documents involve satanic block chains?
Befuddled
Saturday morning, I tottered downstairs with a wobbly head and returned to bed to work on blogs. Going to town, Phil discovered it heaving as ever in the blazing heat and an old pub mate about to become a granny. I went back down for lunch but my head drooped. I lay drowsily on the bed. Unable to sleep, I was disturbed when Phil barged in, oblivious to my closed eyes. Annoyed, I turned over and made another futile attempt. After dinner, I managed a longer spell in the living room to watch films and drink delicious but risky red wine. I fell into a coma at night-time only to wake in the early hours.
Befuddled by the wine, we both struggled to come round Sunday morning. Mostly cloudy, the sun came out at 3 and I got more depressed being stuck in bed during nice weather. Finding inspiration from ye olde Bean Book, Phil concocted a ‘wartime roast’. It resembled more of a Sunday dinner than we expected and prompted jokes about austerity cooking and ideas for variations.
On Saturday, much of Scotland moved to level 1, except the central belt which stayed at level 2. 5,341 new case were identified and 4 deaths announced on Sunday. The Cock told Marr the Delta variant was 40% more infectious than the Alpha, making decisions on easing ‘difficult’. But ¾ of cases were in people who hadn’t been vaccinated and those hospitalised recovered more quickly. Infections and in-patients also fell in Bolton. BBC news asked: ‘would we face a wave or a ripple over summer?‘ and said ministers needed ‘every scrap of data’ before the decision in 8 days’ time on whether to forge ahead with the roadmap. Sage bods predicted 2,000 hospitalisations a day by August and Prof. Reicher called it ‘very foolish’ to relax the rules. As under 30’s were offered jabs, queues formed at dawn to save ‘Freedom Day’. I repeat: didn’t they know it took a month to be effective?
References:
i. My haigas: https://wordpress.com/posts/mondaymorninghaiga.wordpress.com
ii. My Cool Places blog: https://hepdenerose.wordpress.com/
The Corvus Diaries 